Rabbi Judy Chessin grew up with her mother’s adage, “Jewish men don’t beat their wives.”
But the truth, she says, is that faith communities contain all the maladies of the society in which we live.

“To deny it helps no one,” says Temple Beth Or’s spiritual leader.

To raise awareness of domestic violence, Dayton’s four synagogues have agreed to address the issue with their congregations during March.

According to Beth Jacob Congregation’s Rabbi Hillel Fox, the talks will coincide with Shabbat Zachor, the Sabbath of Remembrance.

The week’s Torah portion recalls the ancient atrocities in the attack from the nation of Amalek. It will also remember atrocities happening today, such as domestic violence.

Chessin says the talks will also fall just before the holiday of Purim and the story of Queen Esther.

“It’s a story where women are heroes, especially in a world where women are no more than property to so many other cultures,” she says. “We want to create an environment of education and raise people’s consciousness within the community.”

On March 12, Fox will dedicate his sermon at Beth Jacob Congregation to domestic violence. He says there are many Torah texts from which to draw sermons, including, “Don’t stand idly by the blood of your brother,” a call for action against injustice.

For Temple Israel’s Friday night service on March 18, Rabbi David Sofian has invited Susan Gottschalk to talk about domestic violence.

Gottschalk, a member of Temple Israel, is director of the family violence collaborative for Artemis Center for Alternatives to Domestic Violence.

At Temple Beth Or on March 18 and 19, Chessin will speak about domestic violence.

And at Beth Abraham Synagogue on March 19, a panel will speak at approximately 11 a.m. during services.

The panel, coordinated by Beth Adelman, will include Patti Schwarztrauber, executive director of Artemis Center, Donna Audette, CEO of YWCA Dayton, and Bonnie Parish, executive director of the Family Service Association.

They will give an overview of domestic violence and the local services available to victims and batterers.

The domestic violence awareness initiative grew out of a presentation Gottschalk gave to the Dayton Synagogue Forum in October.

She then spoke to an adult education class at Temple Beth Or about the dynamics of domestic violence: that it is based on power and control.

She says it is important to know the probable scope of the abuse: 40 to 70 percent of those who abuse their intimate partners also abuse a child.

“Victims will turn to their faith communities long before they will turn to a victims’ advocate group,” Gottschalk says.

Rabbi Bernard Barsky of Beth Abraham Synagogue says there are two things to keep in mind in regard to the Jewish community.

First, for many traditional families, the reaction to domestic violence is to keep it quiet and keep the family together.

Second, just because Barsky’s congregation is older, it would be naive to believe the domestic violence is behind them.

“Even if it’s not happening in your home, it could be happening in the home of your child or the home of your neighbor,” he says. “That’s what everyone has to be sensitized to – the signs and the symptoms.”

Gottschalk, whose job is to speak with community groups, says that everyone has to be prepared to help someone who’s being abused.

“Even if a victim discloses, it’s human to want to minimize what we’re hearing because it’s so awful,” she says.

Fox agrees that while it’s difficult to acknowledge, “it’s an issue that we have to be proactive to prevent and resolve.”

For Beth Jacob, this has included posting cards in all the restrooms reading, “Remember, Jewish homes are not all peaceful. Domestic violence affects the entire family. It is not your fault. You are not alone.” It then lists numbers for assistance, including Artemis Center: 222-SAFE.

To prepare synagogues to identify and respond to domestic violence, faith and lay leaders were able to attend the Faith in Action workshop Feb. 24 coordinated by Gottschalk.

She adds that she is available to make presentations to any groups in the community.
To reach Gottschalk, contact the Artemis Center for Alternatives to Domestic Violence at 461-5091.