‘The best thing is having a family’

The Hennings
By Martha Moody Jacobs, Special To The Dayton Jewish Observer

Stephanie and Doug Henning

At a work training seminar in March 2005, juvenile probation officer Stephanie Blum found herself partnered with a substance abuse counselor (now fellow probation officer) named Doug Henning. The two worked for different agencies and had never met. “He was very talkative and flirtatious: it was kind of strange to me,” Stephanie recalls. Doug has a less ambiguous memory: “She was hot.”

A little more than three years later, on July 26, 2008, Stephanie and Doug were married at Temple Israel.

After their first meeting, a mutual friend asked Stephanie if Doug could have her phone number. Stephanie agreed. Their first conversation was interrupted when Doug had to hang up. When he called back later, as planned, Stephanie had fallen asleep.

Doug is the father of identical twin sons, Alex and Brandon, now age 11. He was raised Catholic and attended Catholic schools.

Doug and Stephanie started dating. They could talk for hours and enjoyed shopping, movies, travel, and pizza together. Shortly after they met, Doug was a guest for Passover at Stephanie’s family seder. “That piqued my curiosity,” he recalls.

Doug’s mother, an observant Catholic, was supportive of her son studying Judaism. “She was happy I was spiritual and connecting with something,” he says.

“He found something that he believed in and that made sense to him,” Stephanie adds. “Doug converted after meeting me, but not because of me.”

Doug and Stephanie participated in the Dayton Synagogue Forum’s Introduction to Judaism class. Doug studied for conversion to Judaism with Rabbi David Sofian at Temple Israel.

For his conversion, Doug went to the mikveh and had a symbolic circumcision performed by Dr. Howard Abromowitz. “I still have the gauze pad,” Doug says proudly.

“You don’t!” Stephanie cries.

After Doug’s conversion, Linda and Ric Blum, Stephanie’s parents, held a party in Doug’s honor. “Not only did they support me, they welcomed me,” he said.

After dating for more than two years, Doug decided it was “time to make a commitment.” Before asking Stephanie to marry him, he discussed the idea with Stephanie’s mother and her father, a jeweler.

“When you’re marrying someone whose father owns a jewelry business, finding a ring takes a while,” Doug muses.

On Yom Kippur 2007, Stephanie’s twin sisters and brother were visiting from out of town. Temple Israel’s services ended.

“I was ready to go, I had my purse, we were going to my grandparents’ to break the fast there, and Doug kept trying to drag me into the sanctuary,” Stephanie says. When he finally succeeded, Doug brought Stephanie near the bima, read her A Woman of Valor from Proverbs, pulled her engagement ring from his tallit bag, and dropped to one knee.

“She wasn’t even breathing, it seemed like for five minutes,” Doug recalls. “I finally said, ‘Honey, what do you say?’”

“Doug’s twin sons were sitting in the front two chairs staring at me,” Stephanie says. “I was shocked. The boys gave me cards they’d made.”

As Stephanie recalls, their wedding ceremony — with six bridesmaids and a flower girl for her, six groomsmen and Doug’s twins serving as his best men — was perfect. Doug recalls stomping on the glass and having it shoot out of its protective bag and across the bima twice. The third attempt was a success.

“They had me miked up and I’d been crying the whole time,” Doug says, “and we walked out down the aisle and I was still sniffling and everyone could hear it.”

Now, Stephanie and Doug, Alex and Brandon live together in a house in Englewood, a new home they bought in May 2008.

“When someone comes to my house, I want them to know I’m Jewish,” Doug says.

He describes the menorahs, Kiddush cup and Jewish books that surround him. “I even keep a book on Judaism at work so I can answer people’s questions.”

The boys attend Sunday school and the youth group at Temple Israel, where Stephanie and Doug are also active.

“The best thing,” says Stephanie, “is having a family, a companion, a best friend.”

“We know each other really well,” Doug says. “It’s really great. It’s everything I hoped it would be.”

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